What is your GUARANTEE?

Recently someone walked in without an appointment and asked me "Is it guaranteed?" I had actually never heard that question before point-blank, in person, and it took me off guard. Therefore I thought it would be good to explain what is guaranteed here in this article:

  • I can guarantee you that I've been practicing acupuncture for 8+ years and that I was trained by some of the Western World's most acclaimed teachers including Dr. Qianzhi Wu, Dr. William Morris, Dr Xiaotian Shen, and Elizabeth Fordyce (LAc) and Regan Archibald (LAc) to name a few.
  • I can guarantee you that you will receive the allotted amount of my time that you are scheduled to receive.
  • I can guarantee you that I maintain medical malpractice insurance, and that to date I have a perfect record with regards to practicing acupuncture safely.
  • I can guarantee to comply with CCAOM clean needle technique
  • I can guarantee that in Texas acupuncture is a highly regulated industry, and under the supervision of the Texas Medical Board.
  • I can guarantee that I ONLY use brand new unused needles
  • In most cases, I can guarantee that I have treated your problem successfully before, perhaps hundreds of times. Call before booking, to make sure. If your odds are 50-50 I'll tell ya right up front! The last thing I want is to waste my time, and yours. Trust me: I have no desire to hear complaints nor do I wish to work for free, so I will tell you quite frankly via telephone what sort of results you can expect. My goal IN LIFE is to always under promise and over-deliver.
  • I can guarantee that I am licensed in the state of Texas to perform Acupuncture.
  • I can guarantee you clean sheets, and a sanitary treatment space.
  • I can guarantee that I have successfully passed all NCCAOM board exams, and that I have obtained a very difficult (and expensive) 4 years masters degree from the Academy of Oriental Medicine Austin, Texas (AOMA Graduate School of INTEGRATIVE Medicine).
  • I can guarantee you that I hold the title "Master of Acupuncture and Oriental Medicine" (MAOM) from an AOBTA accredited university.
  • I can guarantee you that I will do my absolute best to help you find a permanent solution to your health challenges.
  • I can guarantee that you don't have to pay for your treatment until after its completed. In other words, if you feel unsatisfied with your treatment then you can walk out without paying a penny - but of course you can also never come back here again.

I always ask that you call before scheduling your first appointment. When you call I will give you a realistic idea about my experience with your particular problem, and the sort of results I've typically experienced. For instance, if you've had degenerative back disease, and back pain for 20 years, you should expect to commit to 20 treatments, possibly more! You are getting older every day, and over a 20 week treatment period 20 weeks will have passed. Therefore you will be 20 weeks older. Acupuncture does not reverse aging. Neither does surgery.

Another example: If you are recovering from paralysis due to stroke then once again, you should be prepared to commit to at least 10 visits. There are no one shot miracle cures for this, but you can experience incremental gains over time. There is a great movie called 9000 needles which sort of puts it in perspective.

On the other hand if you are young and vital, and just "threw your back out yesterday", then it is possible that one treatment may result in an immediate correction, and resolve your condition, for a period of time. Of course later in life the problem is likely to reoccur, because "throwing out your back" is a sign that your body's energy system has somehow become imbalanced. It may be due to overwork, poor nutrition, emotional distress, side effects of other drugs, aging, or lack of proper rest. Its impossible for me to even guess what caused your imbalance, before you have booked your initial consultation. I have seen cases where it resolved immediately, and I have seen cases where it resolved within 24 hours. But no I can not "guarantee" that you will never throw out your back again, and I can not even guarantee that it will be resolved. That being said if you call me the next day and want a refund, I'd probably be offended but I would oblige you. I would only ask you to consider whether you would do the same thing to your primary care physician, or not? Keep in mind that I'm giving you 4-5 minutes for his/her 1 minute, and our educational requirements are roughly equivalent.

With regards to long term therapy: yes, you should receive temporary and ever improving results otherwise why would you keep coming back? Please feel free to call me and I'll tell you what sort of results I've seen with cases like yours!! But no, nothing I can do for you here has a blanket unconditional lifetime guarantee. In no case would I ever refund more than the cost of a single treatment!!! If you're not getting results then it is your responsibility to STOP COMING.

No results can ever be guaranteed by any practicing physician. Did you hear the word: "practicing" physician? Its called a medical practice. If you know a doctor, massage therapist, chiropractor, or physical therapist that guarantees their results please let me know - just email me their name so I can go see them asap. My neck hurts sometimes and I want someone who can guarantee to take care of it forever. Please inform me when you find a 'guarantee' so that I can go and visit that physician immediately. Similarly if you know any massage therapists that "guarantee" their treatments please let me know by contacting me directly, I want to go and visit them immediately!!!!

However, coming back to reality: it is actually illegal for any physician to guarantee any treatment, medication, or surgery. Have you heard that some statistics indicate that about 80 percent of back surgeries (which may cost $30,000 or more) result in a follow up back surgery within 5 years? Have you really considered what it means to have rods and screws placed inside of your spine?

If you are on more than 5 medications, in my experience, acupuncture can at best provide temporary relief. If you regularly take opioids, and you are not interested in stopping, then acupuncture probably would not be a viable long term solution for you. Similarly, if you have no interest in making dietary or lifestyle changes, the chance that Oriental medicine can relieve your symptoms permanently decreases.

The next time that your primary physician writes you a prescription for a medication just ask if he can guarantee it. Ask him if he can guarantee it will work without side effects, pay your $95, and enjoy your 10-15 minutes (if you're lucky).

Generally speaking, most problems WILL REQUIRE more than one visit. I am a practicing acupuncturist, and my goal is to establish a long term relationship with you so that I can help you whenever help is needed. We don't sell miracles here. But acupuncture can be a great alternative to opioids, chiropractic, physical therapy, and massage therapy. I'm happy to work with you on price when it comes to pre-paid, or regular, clients. That's the best guarantee I can give you!

Tagged: guaranteed acupuncture

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